Past Letters of the month

December, 2007



This one is in honor of your great llama sound page. My husband (who is British) makes fun of my poetic attempts as they all end up sounding distinctly like those silly British limericks we all heard as kids. But I learned so much about llama sounds from your terrific site I thought I’d put them together into a poem which would introduce your site to my daughter and her friend. It ain’t Emily Dickinson, that’s for sure! LOL.

Meg

Llama Sounds
by Meg Davis

Llama picture from Meg

I used to think that Llamas
made a noise like horsey mammas
or perhaps a bray like mules and donkeys do.
So imagine my surprise when I came to realize
that they make a dozen noises, not just two.

If the mammas and the cria are comfortable and cozy
they will hum together, though it’s not a tune.
If they fear for their safety, you will hear it quite clearly
as the papas screech to warn the whole commune.

When the big boys get to sparring the noise can be quite jarring
the screaming angry males make such a stir.
There is snorting and deep growling, something akin to howling
as they bash their chests and lay their claim to King.

But when these studs get amorous they’ll orgle to their sweetie
though she might simply cluck for him to leave.
If he doesn’t get the message she will spit into his visage
and off he’ll go with broken heart to grieve.

If they’re having a rough day or they’ve just run out of hay
they will moan and wail to let you know their mind.
But once they’re back to happy — cavorting and all snappy
they act as if they never even whined.

Hum, screech, scream or snort - cluck orgle, growl or wail,
sometimes they even sound like ducks and geese.
Comfy, mad, worried, sad — lonely, lustful, acting bad
or just annoyed when getting shaved of fleece.

If you’ve never met a llama and never heard their clamor
you can search and find their vocals on the net.
Click here and listen now, you’ll be amazed just how
fascinating Llama sounds can get:

Mount Lehman Llamas
http://brianp.mountlehmanllamas.ca/allsounds.html

This letter from Meg was a follow up to the November letter below as part of a series of thirty llama letters she was sending to her daughter.


November, 2007



Hello:

What an absolutely awesome site you have. I was searching the internet for “llama sound” information and boy did I hit the jackpot in finding your site.

I have to share with you why I am searching. My daughter goes to prep school in Indiana (I’m in Kansas). Naturally I miss her, so I sometimes try and think of little projects to keep us laughing and talking. She and a friend of hers are always raving about how they love llamas, so as a joke I created a holiday, which I called the Thirty days of Llamadan (no offense intended) and the idea was that I would send the two of them something about llamas each day for thirty days.

At first, I thought I’d just search the net and come up with a couple of dozen llama poems, stories, photos etc. But, I soon found (although pictures were pretty easy to come by) there wasn’t much else; there seems to be a void of llama writings out there LOL. So, then I decided to write the poems myself . . . phew, has that been a challenge as I am hardly the poet; but, I must admit it’s been a lot of fun. We are currently on Day 10 and my brain cells are popping; but I’m plugging along. I thought I’d send you a couple of my creations for the fun of it, mind you; the photos are not mine (except for the Man of Llama cha and Black Beauty, which I did with Photoshop).

Thanks for a terrific site; I’m planning on sending your links to the girls in one of our Llamadan days in the future; I’m sure they’ll love all of your stuff.

Yours,
Meg Davis


A Tribute to Llamas
by Meg Davis

We know the Dalai Llama preaches from Tibet
and explorer Vasco de Llama, we cannot forget.
Osama bin Llama is infamous for sure
and Llama Montana is an actress and a bore.

The lovely Hedy Llama was a silver screen rage
and Llama Kohei sumo wrestles on stage.
Barack O’Llama has a presidential dream
and Mike Llamadano’s on an NHL team.

“The Man of Llama cha” was a box office hit
and Counting Llamas rock band is musically legit.
The famous Llama Sutra’s a sexy book indeed
and to grow a Llamagranit tree, you only need a seed.

Here’s a toast to Llamas and all the things they’ve done
so lift your Pina CoLlama and toast to Llamadan.


toast to llamas

Happy Llamadan!!!



Llama Grammar
by Meg Davis

Llama Grammar

Who challenges the rules of English
do you know?
It’s the Llama.
Two L’s at the start of a word in a row
What’s the harm — eh?
Who else dares to place twin letters in that space
but the Llama?
Then again, there IS one using vowels just for fun
It’s the Aardvark.



Lovely llamas The Llama
by Meg Davis

Oh lovely little llama
Who lives in Peru
And works for the farmer
On each day anew

Oh lovely little llama
With ribbons in your hair
You’re such a sweet charmer
It almost seems unfair

That you should have to work
On such a gorgeous day
When the sun shines so bright
And the birds sing so gay

Oh lovely little llama
Sneak away with me
We’ll run and we’ll play
Play all day
Fancy Free

Happy Llamadan!!!


Ludwick von Llama
by Meg Davis

Ludwick von Llama

Ludwig von Llama was oh such a charmer
the ladies they couldn’t resist
But when they talked marriage, he’d hook to his carriage
and soon disappear in the mist.

Happy Llamadan!!!



Black Beauty

Black Beauty



October, 2007



I have a bazillion sites bookmarked and yours was one of them. Tonight I finally got around to exploring it. Best. Site. Ever.

I have a bunch of artsy-fartsy friends as well as a few who are true artists — I forwarded your URL equally. So far they all have the same reaction. You’re awesome.

Crap! I really wish I’d known about this before. I would have bought a few (under two bucks, of course) and sent them to add to the collection.

Best of luck to you and the llamas.

Mimi

P.S. If you have a mailing list, please include me.



September, 2007



Hi Brian,

This may be a strange request but I’m interested in possibly purchasing one of your barn art paintings. (Blonde Girl Sitting by Loy Anne McCuaig)

Loy Anne is my grannie. She has lived in Vancouver most of her life. She is currently dying of cancer and living at my Dad's house in Surrey.

A little history . . .

My Grannie has truly lived an amazing life, both good and bad. She was diagnosed with schizophrenia many many years ago, she has done everything from living on the street thinking she is god to listening to voices on the radio lead her on a car trip to Calgary. After living quite the experience she finally found proper medications and was able to get her life in order. Since then, she has spoken to hundreds of thousands of people all over the world. I believe she’s even been to places like Japan to speak about mental health.

Recently she also won the 2007 “Courage To Come Back Award” for her perseverance through her life and where she has gotten with her life considering where she came from. Here is a link to an article about her, you’ll have to scroll down to her if you are interested in reading it. Courage To Come Back Awards.

Anyway, It would mean the world to us to be able to get this painting and be able to give it to her before she passes on, and then to be able to keep it in the family after the fact would be wonderful as well.

Are you at all interested in parting with this painting? We are by no means rich, but if you wanted some money for it I’m sure we could come up with something. I could also maybe offer up my word to one day replace that painting with some other “great work of art” that I happen across at a garage sale or something.

I live in Abbotsford with my wife and children, we would also love to come check out your barn art and llamas if your still open for spectators!

Regards,
James Konkler

James brought his two little boys over on the next weekend and we gave him the painting.

Hopefully his grannie will appreciate seeing it again, she painted it over forty years ago.





August, 2007



Hello, I’m Patricia a journalist from Spain and I’m writting [sic] an article about bad art. I’m impressed about your web. Is your museum like a zoo? What is the reaction of the people when they go to visit your museum? Why did you think to create a museum like that? I need all kind of information about your iniciative [sic]. Thanks so much!!!

Patricia



July, 2007



I haven’t laughed this much in a long time. These art pieces are priceless with your observations on them. I think your site could be subtitled “Blooper Art”. I am a big fan of bloopers and these are great! I just happened to find your site while researching the term “Barn Art”. I am a photographer/artist and was thinking it would be fun to put out a series of pieces called Barn Art, my first of which I will attach for you to put with your collection should you see fit (at no cost because you made me laugh, but please put copyright as PhotoArt by Sharon). This is a piece I created from a picture I took of the side of an old abandoned house (but it could have been a barn, eh?) and then added my own touches to it.

Also, I live in California now, but spent 25 years in British Columbia growing up and the towns you talk about are familiar to me. My parents still live in Langley. I am going to send them the link to this site because they will enjoy it too.

Thanks for the entertainment, and please do let me know what you think of my barn art I call Wood Monkeys. Also I attached a painting we found in a cabin in the mountains of Southern California that we are restoring. It is a painting of the cabin in the snow. Notice that the lake seems suspended in the snow above and to the right of the cabin’s front.

Sharon

Wood Monkeys
Cabin in the snow


June, 2007



Dear Brian and Jane

I was delighed to find your collection on llama sound on the web. I’ve been researching music in the Bolivia over the past 20 years, which has involved me living for extended periods with llama herders. I’ve even written about how local understandings of llama sounds shapes ideas about local flute performance (contrasted timbres — with fascinating meanings). In prehispanic times llamas were apparently tied up in the town squares without food and drink so that their distress cries attracted the rain at the start of the rainy growing season. There’s also an extraordinary account and drawing of the Inca king himself learning a song from a tethered llama. I’ve got recordings of mass llama mating rituals and hungry cries on the CD in the book I’ve written about music in cental Bolivia — as well as writing about these prehispanic practices. However, I’ve never heard really hungry and thirsty llamas — hard to imagine what more sustained crying is like — and maybe what the Inka was imitating. (I’m not suggesting you put your animals through this!) What is for sure is that llama sounds are immensely expressive and full of variation. Great to see that you also appreciate this!

All the best

Henry

The doctor’s book Music and the Poetics of Production in the Bolivian Andes and another article “The Llama's Flute” are both available on his web site.




May, 2007



Hey, I stumbled across your site while doing an image google for “llama”.

My mom and I have never laughed so hard! Very nice pics. We respect your imagination.

Thanks for the laughs,

Johannes and Marilyn



April, 2007



I am a new llama owner, recently found your web site and wanted to give you a big thanks for all the helpful information.

Lori



March, 2007



Hi

We operate a private large animal rescue farm and sanctuary in Vermont. At the end of December we had a mother and her 6 month old son come in from a neglect case. Mama llama and baby gained weight and came along very nicely, good temperament, easy to handle after they learned to trust us. Lucy (the mama) began somewhat strange behavior for her and we thought that possibly she looked a little chubbier than usual. At the beginning of this week I had convinced myself that possibly she had been bred back before she was rescued. While we have had numerous llamas and babies come in, we never do any breeding here and all animals are sterilized, we had never had a llama give birth here. I decided to look thru Google for birthing information, I found your wonderful website with all the explanations and pictures of birthing. I was feeling new confidence that we could handle this, if, it did happen. This morning at 10:09 we had a beautiful baby girl born, without any complications and we knew exactly what to expect, thanks to you. I was fortunate enough to be there with her from the first of her labor and it was one of the most beautiful births that I have ever witnessed.

Thank you so much for taking the time to share all of this information, it made a world of difference to us and Lucy and baby.

Deb
Morse Rescue Farm



February, 2007



You people are seriously crazy . . . I’m glad I stumbled onto your page today; I had a bad case of the Monday blues, and those hilarious llama juxtapositions (especially the Sphinx) shook me right out of it; I literally was shaking with laughter, as quietly as possible, in my office cubicle.

I love llamas and I enjoy people with a good sense of humor. Thanks for a creative website!

Leslie



January, 2007



Hello

My name is Olivia and I don’t understand why you feel the need to genetically alter the chromosomes and genes of a llama and emu. Your [sic] changing nature! I really would like to know your reasoning behind the implants and other mutations you have created. I can’t believe that you could possibly have an accidental cross-breeding. It’s genetically impossible for a zebra to cross with a llama naturally. So there is no way you could do that on accident. Why the hell would you put a llama near llama near radioactive material. Be warned when I get my hands on the facts you are going to be sorry that you ever did these cruel things to llamas. WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT YOU SICK BASTARD?

Olivia

You’ve gotta love Olivia. At least she is passionate!